pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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