Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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