My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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