I want to have your abortion
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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