it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
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