Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
