But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Pants are for mortals
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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