How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
