Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
