how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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