I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
