I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
