Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
