I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
