You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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