I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
