On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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