Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
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