They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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