Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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