I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
honey bunches of taint.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
