YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Randomize
