Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize