The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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