Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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