i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
