Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
