Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
