I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
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