I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
