I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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