I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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