I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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