i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
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