just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize
