I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
