The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize