you have to choose: penises or morals?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
