I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
