new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize
