Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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