I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
