you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
Randomize
