youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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