The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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