i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize