yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
