spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize