Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
