I'm jealous of your bromance
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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