I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
